Gilead

We went out to a patio last night to have supper and celebrate bereaved mother's day. Celebration may be too big a word. But we went to have a meal and some drinks and because we desperately needed to get out of the house and because, being the functional adults that we are, we ran out of toilet paper. So we decided to make a date out of it. I was already in a bad mood before the conversation happened. I didn't like my drink and the table beside us was loud and the sun was shining right in my eyes. Things that I would have normally been able to tolerate but all of them piled together, on this day, was enough to make me crazy. And then, from the loud table behind me, I heard "We never get to come to patios anymore. You know, because of the baby." My ears tuned in to their conversation. As much as I hate it baby is one of the words that has the power to turn my head and depending on how you use it will depend how I feel about you from that moment on. "She'...

There is a quote somewhere that says something along the lines of "You think you've hit rock bottom and then you realize you're standing on a trap door." That's how I feel. You think the worst thing that can ever happen to a person happened to you... and then the things keep coming. I had a meltdown in front of town hall today that wasn't really about what everyone thought it was about. I went to register our dog and ended up encountering problems because one of the breeds listed on her adoption file was pitbull, and if she's pitbull there's a ton of other hoops we have to jump through which include a higher fence and having her muzzled every time she leaves the house. And I was outraged that people can discriminate against dogs like that and assume all pitbulls are violent (If you've met our dog she is the sweetest thing) and I am not going to treat our dog like she did anything wrong when she hasn't. I wanted to grab her and protect her and...